Be Led By Your Dreams

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Which do you think is more powerful, dreams or fears?

The answer really depends on you. Which one do you allow to have the most influence on your life?

Fear is a natural response. When dangers are present our body activates defense mechanisms to keep it safe. When we become afraid, our adrenaline kicks in. We are more alert. Our heart is beating very fast. Our brain is racing. This is all a good thing. When we’re in danger, we need this to happen. The problem is, what we’re afraid of these days is, in most cases, not life threatening.

Today, we fear anything outside of our comfort zone. It could be talking in public, admitting you were wrong, asking someone out for the first time, taking a chance by starting a business, maybe it’s quitting a good job to do something you have always wanted to do.

Dreams are obviously very different. The things we want, and think about regularly, are our dreams. When we are kids our dreams are huge. We want to be doctors, lawyers, olympic athletes, race car drivers, astronauts, or even the leader of a great nation.

As we get older, our dreams change. We have a dream, evaluate it for its feasibility, determine if we really want to put in all that work, determine if the reward is big enough, if we think we are capable of doing what’s necessary, and eventually it comes down to our self confidence. Do we think we are capable of succeeding? We often allow fear to keep us from realizing our dreams.

The answer to the initial question is really up to you. To some, fear is much more powerful. They allow fear to keep them from their dreams. While to others, their dreams are stronger than their fear. These people don’t allow their fear to stop them from realizing their dreams.

It’s really up to you. If you allow fear to keep you from really living your life, then to you fear is more powerful. If you focus on achieving your dreams and overcoming your fears, then to you your dreams are more powerful.

The choice is yours and yours alone.

Remember, if you want to live a happy fulfilled life, don’t be controlled by the fears in your mind. Be led by the dreams in your heart.

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Don’t Forget the Past. Learn from It.

There is a popular adage in our society that goes something like this: Forget the past, don’t worry about the future, live in the present.

There is truth to this statement. Far too many of us live defined by the choices we made in the past. This shouldn’t be the case. After all, each new day presents opportunity to become a new person on a new road destined for a new future.

But those who choose to simply forget the past miss out on its fullest potential. There are valuable lessons to be learned from it. And those who choose to ask the right questions about their past are most prepared to live life to the fullest in the present.

Consider the lessons we can learn from our past. By simply asking the right questions, we can discover…

Strengths that define us. The talents and abilities we use to navigate and provide value to this world define the lives we live and the change we can offer. And by recalling our strengths in the past, we can better recognize our opportunities in the present.

Weaknesses that frustrate us. We all have weaknesses in personality and competence. When left unaddressed, these weaknesses limit our potential for impact and significance. Discover them. Recognize them. And learn to overcome them by seeking the help of others.

Causes that energize us. Our lives find the greatest joy when we help others discover theirs. Which social causes have energized you in the past? What role were you able to fulfill in helping others? And how can similar pursuits bring new energy into your life today?

Relationships that inspire us. Over the course of our lives, there are, no doubt, a number of people who have inspired us to become better versions of ourselves. What traits do they have in common? And can you surround yourself with more people like them today?

Environments that derail us. The company we keep and the cultures we function in either bring us inspiration or derail our progress. Are there relationships in your past that continually brought you down and resulted in destructive decisions? If so, learn from your past to avoid them.

Habits that invigorate us. Over the course of our lives, we employ a variety of disciplines to make the most of it. We discover a new diet, a new fitness practice, or a new morning routine. We experiment with them–some work, some don’t. Eventually, these new disciplines either become habits or they fade from our memory. Look back. Recognize the habits that brought energy, health, and invigoration into your life. And embrace them again.

Affections that bring joy to us. Various matters of our mind and affections of our heart bring different amounts of joy, meaning, and fulfillment into our lives. What affections during life brought you the most joy? And have you gotten away from them? If so, return. And in so doing, recognize what distracted you from them in the first place.

Pursuits that distract us. Ultimately, the decisions we make with the resources we’ve been given determine the life we end up living. Most of the resources we have at our personal disposal are finite and limited (money, time, energy). By definition, the allocation of them towards one pursuit limits the amount of resources we have available towards others. It is wise to recognize the subtle pursuits that routinely distract you from the truest desires of your heart.

Addictions that control us. We are a people that too often give control of our most precious asset to another. We fall under the influence of substances, possessions, or entertainment. And when we do, our life is no longer our own. Identify the recurring controlling substances (addictions) in your life and humbly seek the help needed to remove their influence over you.

Temptations that trip us. Similar to addictions, we each have unique weaknesses to temptation. These temptations may vary in nature, but each detract from the fullest life possible. But they do not need to define us. We can begin anew. However, only those who can identify and admit their mistakes in the past have opportunity to learn from them.

Learning styles that suit us. We all learn differently. Some are visual learners, some are verbal, some learn best in a group setting, while others learn best alone. Your learning style is as unique to you as your fingerprint. The important thing is to recognize and understand what style suits you best. This life ought to be filled with constant learning… and the sooner we recognize how we learn best, the sooner we’ll begin to grow in it.

Motivations that compel us. Deep in our heart, our motivation runs supreme. It determines the decisions we make, the use of our time, and the words we choose to use. Understanding our deepest motivations is a difficult task. It requires stillness, patience, and consistent self-evaluation. But the more we discover why we do the things we do, the easier it is for us to make the most of the present we are living in today.

If we start asking the right questions, there are countless life-giving lessons we can learn from our past. Never feel that you have to be defined by it. But it would be equally foolish to forget it completely when it offers so much potential for the present.

Make A Life

If we take the time to be realistic, and ask ourselves, “What do I really want out of life?” we may discover the secret to our own happiness; the answer to our own happiness lies in the answer to that question.

Be True to Yourself

There is nothing wrong with pursuing our personal dreams and desires, as long as they are morally and ethically sound. Being true to yourself means responding to your own inner voice or inner child, and granting yourself daily wishes. A ride on a merry-go-round or learning something new are both ways to cultivate happiness while answering the inner call to pursue hidden dreams.

Enjoy Every Moment

Being present in the moment means being aware, appreciative, and accepting. This is how we make a life for ourselves. There are people, and animals, too, showing their love, gratitude, and concern right there in front of us. Are we enjoying them? Are we embracing and cherishing each moment that unfolds – whether that moment is good, bad, or indifferent? If not, chances are we are living our lives on autopilot.

Making a Life

Making a life that is worth enjoying and living is not rooted in tangible things, but in intangible things. The people we meet, know, and love are great assets to our existence. Are we enjoying them as much as we can? Are we spending time creating memories with friends and family members?

Acceptance and Gratitude Lead to Joy

Living in the here and now means doing so with a dose of acceptance. It means we tell the Universe, “I appreciate who I am, what I have and what will come.” This attitude leads to both self-acceptance and gratitude. Then, we can find a place of joy unimaginable.

Having a happy life is not really hard to achieve. There are family and friends close by. There are museums and parks and local events filled with activities to occupy the time of any person. Take a chance, move outside your comfort zone, and live a happy, joyous, carefree life that is built on pleasant memories.

VBSRE TC Awards 2019: Brokerage Loyalty Award Winner

It’s time to celebrate our final TC client in honor of our 2,000th transaction coordinated!

This week’s award is our Brokerage Loyalty Award, which goes out to the Brokerage TC Client that has been with us the longest and the winner is…. L. Michelle Terrell with Above & Beyond Realty!

2019 TC Awards

"I have always been in awe of Michelle‘s work ethic. Not only is she a broker, but she owns a full, thriving property management company and also owns her own restaurant. Michelle has given us the honor to support her in all of her businesses! She’s been a client of ours since our very first year and is still a dedicated client to this day. We are forever grateful for her loyalty and hope she will be our forever client!" -Tiffany Haynes, CEO & Owner VBSRE

We want to say THANK YOU again to all of our amazing clients that have been a part of this journey to reach 2,000 transactions coordinated. It is our absolute pleasure to help your business succeed and to take away the chaos and replace it with calm! To our award winners, congratulations again and thank you for trusting us with all of your transaction needs and for partnering with us for the long haul!

We cannot wait to celebrate another milestone!

VBSRE TC Awards 2019: Agent Loyalty Award Winner

The 2,000th transaction coordinated celebration continues!

This week’s award is our Agent Loyalty Award, which goes out to the Individual Agent TC Client that has been with us the longest and the winner is…. Raul Arriaga!

2019 TC Awards

"Raul is extremely hard-working and very caring when it comes to his clients. Exceeding their expectations and providing them with the best quality service is his goal. He loves helping clients achieve the American Dream and as a loyal client of VBSRE, we can attest to his success in doing just that. Raul, thank you so much for your support and for allowing us to help you with your business all these years! You are a valued client and a good friend." -Belinda Ferrand, Transaction Coordinating Manager

Tune in next week to see who wins the Brokerage Loyalty Award!

Believe in Yourself

How To Believe In Yourself And Boost Your Self-Confidence

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The ability to believe in yourself can change your life.

Just think:

What difference would it make in your life if you had an absolutely unshakable confidence in your ability to achieve anything you really put your mind to?

What would you want and wish and hope for?

What would you dare to dream if you believed in yourself with such deep conviction that you had no fears of failure whatsoever?

How To Believe In Yourself

Most people start off with little or low self-confidence, but as a result of their own efforts, they become bold and brave and outgoing. And we’ve discovered that if you do the same things that other self-confident men and women do, you, too, will experience the same feelings and get the same results.

The key is to be true to yourself, to be true to the very best that is in you, and to live your life consistent with your highest values and aspirations. This is the only way to truly learn how to believe in yourself.

Take some time to think about who you are and what you believe in and what is important to you.

If you want to change your life by becoming an author, believe that you can do it. The hardest step in that journey is finding the confidence to learn how to write a book. Once you get a hold of a proven system to plan, produce, and publish your work, the larger goal becomes easier to attain.

By believing in yourself, you will find the courage to take immediate action on your goals. And this, as you may know, is the key to success!

I encourage you to never compromise your integrity by trying to be or say or feel something that is not true for you.

And – more importantly – never compromise your potential to grow due to self-limiting doubts. Instead, embrace your confidence and believe in yourself because you really can do anything you put your mind to.

Tell Yourself You Have Confidence And Believe It

Repeat affirmations such as “I believe in myself” every day.

Your thoughts become words and your words become your actions. If you continue to tell yourself that you believe in yourself, eventually you really will believe in yourself.

It’s that simple.

Have the courage to accept yourself as you really are—not as you might be, or as someone else thinks you should be—and know that, taking everything into consideration, you are a pretty good person.

After all, we all have our own talents, skills, and abilities that make us extraordinary.

No one, including yourself, has any idea of your capabilities or of what you might ultimately do or become. Perhaps the hardest thing to do in life is to accept how extraordinary you really can be, believe in yourself, and then to incorporate this awareness into your attitude and personality.

Your Time is Limited

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma -- which is living with the results of other people's thinking."

Teaching video from Steve Jobs' 2005 Stanford commencement speech.

VBSRE TC Awards 2019: Super Hero Award Winner

The celebration continues!! We’re so excited that we hit our 2,000th transaction coordinated, so we’re celebrating all month long!

This week’s award is our Superhero Award, which goes out to the Individual Agent that has completed the most contracts with us and the winner is…. Cory Meals!

Cory Meals is such an amazing agent to work with and it’s obvious why he’s the individual agent who’s completed the most contracts. He is super laid back, very approachable, and his social media will almost always put a smile on your face! Cory will always go the extra mile to get the job done. Early mornings, late nights, calls, texts, emails, maybe even capturing a snake! His commitment is undeniable, but he is so humble and appreciates all the support he receives behind the scenes. He always makes it a point to say please, thank you, and to let us know we’re appreciated. It is a true joy working along side him with not only transactions, but listings and marketing too! We love watching him continue to crush new goals and achieve greater success! Thank you for not only trusting us to assist you, but making it such a joy to do so.
— Angela Williams, Listing Coordinating Manager

Congratulations Cory! We are thankful for your support and excited to see our partnership grow!

Come back next week to see who wins the Agent Loyalty Award!

VBSRE 2019 TC Awards: Team Domination Award Winner

In light of celebrating our 2,000th transaction coordinated, we are having a special 2019 TC Awards celebration virtually for the entire month of June!

Our first award is the Team Domination Award which goes to the Real Estate Team that has completed the most contracts with us and the winners are…….. The D’Unger Team!! Marian, Nancy, Jim, Vickie, Michael and Matthew, it is our great pleasure to help your business succeed and be in this partnership with you!

Virtual Business Solutions Real Estate Transaction Coordinator Awards
The D’Unger Team is such a great team to work with and so deserving of the Team Domination Award! Even though they are high producers, they never fail to expect the best and highest quality of work done for each client they assist in the Real Estate process. It has been such an honor working with them on not only their Transactions, but on their Listings, and Marketing over the past couple years! We love our D’Unger Team and all their Agents! Thank you for trusting us to assist you!
— Tristan Skiles, COO

Congratulations again D’Unger Team! You truly are the Real Estate Rockstars!

Stay tuned next week to find out the winner of the ‘Superhero Award’!

Believing in Yourself Is the First Step to Success

Courage requires the incredible power of believing in yourself. Or does belief in yourself require courage? A man on the battlefield looks inwardly to survive first and foremost. Despite the support of his team around him, fearlessness motivates him to act on behalf of the task at hand. Taking risks. He relies on his own ingenuity to live another day. No one else.

1.Exploit your abilities

Knowing your strengths and weaknesses are essential to success. Exploiting strengths while ignoring weaknesses, however, stifles confidence. It is not the fear, but the uncertainty of one's abilities that make someone uncomfortable. Becoming adept at a skill maximizes efficacy and minimizes equating judgment by others as a means of achievement.

2.Charge ahead

During the Black Hawk War of 1832, Abraham Lincoln enlisted as a captain and returned as a private, but it did not stop his determination or cause him to shrink back from serving. Additionally, Lincoln did not allow numerous defeats in running for public office to deter him from continuing. He believed his contribution mattered no matter which capacity he delivered it. He stuck to his convictions and proved failure is only a bridge to accomplishment.

3. Trust Thyself

In a world where trust wains, trusting your instincts is what merits the most worthy consideration. Invest in what you know and others will, too. Trust in your competence, even if you're inexperienced, will elicit a positive response. A first-time father has no experience, but negotiates his way through parenthood by trial and error. Innovation is untested, yet imperative to progress.

Believing in yourself is the first step to success whether it means your life, your career, or simply your confidence, and in that lies your power.

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We Have Coordinated 2,000 Contracts!

Real Estate Virtual Assistant

We‘ve reached another HUGE milestone here at Virtual Business Solutions Real Estate! 

The company as a whole has coordinated 2,000 contracts as of this month!

Transaction coordinating started as a service that only our CEO Tiffany did, while our COO Tristan did the listings. As of 2019, we have evolved to a staff of sixteen, 5 of whom are transaction coordinators. In 2016 we created a transaction coordinator manager position to complete audits,  increase oversight and to have ongoing and available mentorship. In May of 2019, we hit 2,000 contracts closed.

The success we have achieved is due to an outstanding all-encompassing package:

  • Robust & Thorough: Sending all contact information to all parties no matter whose side we support. Proactive measures, asking for items before they’re late, checking in with all parties before issues are brought to us in the final hour. Handling the clients system of record - Dotloop, Skyslope, Reesio - we know them all! Sending the extra touches to the client (utility transfer, walk through of home warranty process).

  • Marketing Included: We ensure everything you need to maximize from your transaction is included. Request reviews, social media posts after closing and designing your Just Sold postcard.

  • Brand Ambassador: Our coordinators work out of assistant accounts to appear in-house with the agent. Many agents that call me have worked with our team on the other side of transaction and never knew. Our intention is to strengthen our clients brand and not our own.

Our team goes above and beyond to please each client. Their ambition to over-deliver, coupled with a robust and proactive system, all packaged at a price an independent agent can pay or a broker can absorb for his team, has positioned us as leaders in this niche industry. 

Thank you to an amazing team and incredibly loyal clients, we celebrate today, 2,000 contracts coordinated!


Be Somebody Who Makes Everybody Feel Like Somebody

You know that woman who looks beyond stressed behind you in line at the grocery store? Or your elderly neighbor you only catch a glimpse of when they’re collecting their mail? Take a minute to say hello to them, or happy Friday, or just smile! We’re all busy, but it’s equally rewarding for you to make someone else feel special by simply acknowledging them, complimenting them, or starting up small talk, as it is for them. Think about when something like a simple “hey” or an “I like your dress” turned your otherwise crappy day around. You never know what someone else is going through and how much of a difference you might really make for them.

How to Find The Positive in Every Day

With a slight change in attitude, you can start to change the atmosphere around you. Here are a few ways to start: 

  • Do you find yourself worrying too much about things you can’t control? Turn that fear into a call-to-action. Sometimes that thing you fear most is the one thing you need to do to help propel your life forward. Overcome fear with 20 seconds of insane courage, take the first step and watch how your life will change.

  • Prioritize your tasks. Make a to-do list to better organize your day. Start by placing all of the tasks you dread at the top and end your list with the tasks you enjoy. Remember to write down at least 3 steps you can take to bring you closer to accomplishing the goals you've set.

  • Learn from your challenges. What deep lessons can you learn from the struggle you're going through? What can you take from it, good or bad, that will leave you better prepared for what might come your way in the future? In all things, be grateful and have faith.

  • Put a time limit on your pity party. Allocate five minutes to vent your frustrations and then put it behind you. Or write down your worries on a piece of paper, acknowledge they exist, then crumple it up and throw it away. Excessive worrying about things out of your control will just lead to problems that weren't there to begin with. 

  • Focus on the positive. Learn to use positive language. Get lost in the simple blessings of each day. Begin a gratitude journal. Forgive others, which often is a gift to yourself. As you grow in this positive mindset change, you’ll find yourself noticing the good happening around you. Seemingly small things such as love, wisdom and passion will accelerate you toward an abundant life.

How To Become The Person You Were Meant To Be

it’s time to stop apologizing for who you are. it’s time to become who you were made to be.”
— Rachel Hollis

From mindbodygreen:

You want to be successful. You know you were put on this earth to contribute to the world in a big way. So you slave away for long hours, sacrifice time with your family and friends, and put all of your energy into helping others.

One day, when you’re successful, it will pay off. One day, you can slow down and relax. One day, you’ll make the contribution you were meant to make.

Except it doesn’t work like that. You’re building your future right now. And every decision you make is setting the boundaries, rules, and habits for what’s to come. So, instead of waiting to reach a milestone before you can build the lifestyle you want, let’s set the right foundation now for future success to grow.

Because happy, healthy people change the world. Burned out people just fuel their egos.

Want to build your successful dream life? Follow these five tips:

1. Start backward.

Have you ever tried to build an IKEA desk without the picture? Expect hours of frustration and mistakes. You can’t build success if you don’t know what it looks like. Decide exactly what success means to you. How much money you make, how many hours you work, how many lives you change, who you ideally work with, who you refuse to work with, where you vacation, how much you exercise, what kind of relationships you have, what kind of food you eat. When you create a clear blueprint of the final picture, you’ll know how to take the steps to get there. Clarity means focus, which means success.

2. Eat, sleep, and breathe success.

Let’s face it — success doesn’t just happen in a vacuum. If you have a toxic relationship, sooner or later that’s going to impact the energy you can put into your job. True success is really about holistically living the life of your dreams, so start with what you can control. Eat, sleep, exercise, and interact the way a successful person would. Decide to remove toxins of any form from your life, and value yourself as if you were born to be successful. Because, truthfully, you were.

3. Be who you are, not who you wish you were.

You were born with a set of inherent skills and passions. For the heck of it, let’s call that a life purpose. But people often get so focused on improving what they’re not good at that they ignore their inherent strengths. You were born this way for a reason. Learn how to rely on your strengths and ask for help on your weaknesses. It will make life more enjoyable and make you remarkably more successful.

4. Know your value.

You believe you were put on this earth for a specific reason. You have the antidote to somebody’s problem. So why are you doubting your self-worth? People are desperate for what you have to offer, and you’re the only person standing in your way. Once you get really clear on exactly what you have to offer and how much it’s worth, it will influence everything from how successful you allow yourself to be, to how much you charge, to how you value your time.

5. Assume this is it.

We never know what the future will hold. You may be the next Oprah, or you might never move from your present state. So be happy with where you are right now. Don’t wait to design the exact relationships, work life, and happiness that you want. Even if you can only start with a simple blog or taking a tiny step toward your goal today, start doing it. Because if you start building the foundation for the life you want now, you’ve already reached success. The rest is just icing on the cake as that mansion starts to grow.

Success is just as much an internal mindset as it is an outward experience. When you realize how much you have to contribute to the world and raise your standards to match that level, the rest will fall into place.

Because success is really about consciously creating your dream life — the life you were born to live. And, when you do that, you’ll truly be living your life purpose.

Just try to stop someone that happy from changing the world. I dare you.

The Boss Ladies of VBSRE!

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And one day she discovered that she was fierce, and strong, and full of fire, and that not even she could hold herself back because her passion burned brighter than her fears

Our CEO, Tiffany Haynes and COO, Tristan Skiles are the amazing boss ladies behind Virtual Business Solutions and Virtual Business Solutions Real Estate! These ladies handle all the business details while also finding time to focus on their families. They have the work-life balance locked down and are the true definition of #bossladies!

From mentoring new team members to listening to employees’ personal issues. From supporting colleagues unconditionally to helping those facing workplace blues – we are so thankful that no matter how hard they crack the whip, they have a strong, loving human side to their leadership.

They assign work tasks to the team that allows each individual the chance to expand on their knowledge and build confidence in their abilities, while also being there to answer questions and provide support. They transform our mistakes into valuable lessons. Their leadership and dedication has made us all more productive and converted all of our skills into strengths.

They bring out the best in each team member and do the same for each other. We love our #BossLadies!


Do you know what it takes to be a powerful and confident boss lady? Well, have a seat, and let’s get right into it. We’re going to tell you the top 10 things all future #GirlBosses will need to know to make their dreams of success a reality.

1. TRUST YOUR TALENT AND ABILITY TO MANAGE THE HARD STUFF

Research shows that if you’re an over-achiever, you’re more likely to suffer from Impostor’s Syndrome, that nagging feeling that no matter how accomplished and good you are at your job, it’s only by fluke that you’ve managed to get this far. Like most high-achievers, you set the bar pretty high for yourself. Your standard of “good enough” is far (faaaar) higher than your average person, and so, you are going to be plagued by the sense that your work is never good enough. If you’re going to be a game-changer, you’ll need to rid yourself of these feelings of inadequacy and just trust your talent. As MrsGuided.com founder Alison Kornberg-Walch pointed out, ‘You can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.'”

2. DON’T BACK DOWN FROM A FIGHT OR AN OPPORTUNITY

As a future boss lady, your ability to spot opportunities and stick to your guns will determine the swiftness of your meteoric rise to success. “If you’re offered a seat on a rocket ship,” says Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg, “don’t ask what seat! Just get on.” Whether you are asking your boss for a raise, or standing up to a bitchy co-worker, confrontation is basically a non-negotiable skill in the work place. The same is true of opportunities. And like conflicts, they rarely come when it’s most convenient for you, so when they do, be ready and don’t hesitate for a moment.

3. LEARN TO LOVE YOUR HATERS

One of the greatest misconceptions about life is that it’s supposed to be easy. This may be true for a very lucky few, but for the majority of us the world is going to be an unforgiving place where nothing good comes easily. With every step you climb, there will be a swarm of haters to drag you down. These are the mosquitoes and crying babies of the professional world. Take a step back, keep things in perspective and don’t take it personally.

4.  LEARN SOMETHING NEW EVERYDAY

Ever heard of professional hubris? It’s what can happen when you are young, talented and you’ve never been turned down, so of course you’re going to think you are God’s gift to [insert your profession here]. Yes, you may be amazing at your job, but you are still going to make mistakes and learn a lot along the way. You should never feel like your learning days are behind you. Within the first three years out of college, your professional skills will likely quadruple. That is, as long as you are open to learning and accept that there is always some way you can improve.

5. REDEFINE YOURSELF

Take a good long look at yourself in the mirror, who do you see? If the person staring back at you feels little different from your 18 year old self, you still have some spiritual and emotional growing to do. Though its amazing to feel young at any age, its a whole other thing when this means that you’re not allowing yourself to feel the power of responsibility that comes with being an adult. A boss lady is an ambitious and talented woman whose decisions can impact not just her own life, but the whole world. That’s the incredible power (and burden) of responsibility that comes with reaching for your dreams. Absorb the image of strength into your identity, and know that you are no longer just a kid playing grown up, but someone who can change the world.

6. TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR EMOTIONS

“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day,” wrote Elizabeth Gilbert in Eat Pray Love, “This is a power you can cultivate.” Be resilient, level-headed and confident. Take a chapter from Kelly Cutrone and go outside if you need to cry at work. It sounds harsh, but all she meant is that you are not your feelings. There is a huge difference between thinking “I feel angry” and “I am angry.” In one you identify a feeling, and in the other you identify WITH the feeling. This isn’t a big deal…until shit hits the fan at work and you end up falling apart emotionally. Feelings are just random impulses that happen to your body. By not identifying with your emotions, you will be able to stay cool and rational even in the most stressful work situations.

7. FEEL THE FEAR AND DO IT ANYWAY

Fear can take many forms, for some it is the fear of looking stupid, or of looking like you don’t know what you’re doing. Being a boss lady means knowing that taking risks and looking stupid is an essential part of the learning process. Don’t overthink this, just go for it.

8. CHECK THAT ATTITUDE OF SCARCITY

There are statistically very few rich people on this planet. We don’t know you, but we’re willing to bet that most of you reading this right now probably didn’t grow up in a home where you used dollar bills to light your Venetian marble fireplace. But what happens if you grow up feeling like you never had any of the things you wanted or needed as a kid? Some people develop an attitude of scarcity, plagued with a feeling of being stuck on the sidelines while everyone else has the time of their lives. It can be incredibly difficult to reach for your stars when all your life the world has been sending you messages that people like you don’t make it to the top. People who’ve grown up with financial (or emotional) deprivation will tend to obsess over what they lack, instead of taking stock of what they do have. Those who had very little food will over-eat, those who had very little to wear will become shopacholics. Studies reveal that an attitude of scarcity has a measurable short-term effect on both your body, and can drop your IQ by as much as 13 points, not to mention what it does to your self-esteem and overall motivation. So do yourself and your future success a big favor and start a gratitude journal. Write in it every day. Don’t let your past stand in the way of your future.

9. FIND YOUR PEOPLE

You know the saying, “Build it and they will come”? It should really be, “Find them and it will get built.” Whether you are starting a new handbag line, or are freelancing as a photographer, nothing good ever gets built without a good team to help guide, inspire and motivate you along the difficult path to your dreams.

10. IT TAKES YEARS OF PRACTICE TO REACH PERFECTION

Boss Ladies tend to have a serious perfectionist streak, which means that they feel disappointed with themselves when they can’t get things perfect from the start. Best-selling author Emily Giffin, put it this way, “Perfection isn’t what matters. In fact, it’s the very thing that can destroy you if you let it.” Whether you’re designing dresses or websites, whether you’re a photographer or a producer, your technique will naturally get better over time. It’s important to have that long term, practice makes perfect perspective and develop an attitude of “this is good enough for now.” If you wait until it’s perfect, you’re going to end up waiting forever.

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Overcome Obstacles And Reclaim Your Power

Sometimes when we’re knocked around by life, it can weaken our self-esteem, so it’s important to stand in your own power.

Be willing to leave behind pursuits that do not deliver results. Far too many people discount the value of redirecting their attention when all attempts are exhausted. Pride, self-worth and time invested are the main reasons for flogging a dead horse.

The following points will help you overcome obstacles and reclaim your power:

1. Distance Yourself From The Drama

When faced with an obstacle, emotions run high since you’re likely to react to the ensuing drama. Step back from the chaos and see the obstacle from a greater perspective.

An accomplished Australian artist once noted that when she oil paints, she prefers to take regular breaks. She said this allows her to return to her work with fresh eyes each time and approach the painting from a different perspective. You might adopt the same tactic with your obstacle and come back to it with renewed enthusiasm when the time is right.

2. Seek Out Necessary Resources

Often you may lack provisions, finances, strategies or a key piece of knowledge to conquer your obstacle. The key is to acknowledge that it is ‘resource related’. For example, you may need a key software program to automate a process, freeing you up to focus on more important work. Consult those who can help you overcome the hurdle. As they say, enlist a fresh pair of eyes to see what you may be missing.

3. Gain Perspective

It can overwhelm you when an unforeseen obstacle emerges. To get caught up in the ensuing crisis redirects vital resources to make critical decisions. Gaining perspective helps you step away from the ‘noise’. You might seek help from others, talk to friends or loved ones who can offer a different assessment of your challenge.

Perspective does not imply dissociating from the obstacle in resignation. It means viewing it from numerous vantage points while considering other options. It was author Robert Brault who wrote: “We are kept from our goal, not by obstacles but by a clear path to a lesser goal.”

4Evaluate The Obstacle

Can something be done to overcome the obstacle now or does it require expert help? Consider it objectively as though you were seeing it for the first time. Use logic and sound judgement to avoid becoming emotionally enslaved to the task. “Winners know they’re going to face hurdles, obstacles, failures, tragedies, and disasters — the same as everybody else,” states Larry Weidel in Serial Winner: 5 Actions to Create Your Cycle of Success.

5. Stay Focused And Committed

Often an obstacle is not intended to weaken your actions. It is an invitation to get clear on the process to advance to the next stage. It is advising you to attend to a particular aspect now instead of the future when you have invested valuable time and energy. You might recall Thomas Edison’s well-known passage of 1,000 ways that did not work to invent the light bulb.

Be unrelenting in your commitment — do not give up. “Obstacles are figments of your thinking. That’s why as soon as your old thinking departs, new thinking arrives and obstacles fade away,” affirms sports psychologist Garret Kramer in The Path of No Resistance: Why Overcoming is Simpler than You Think.

Don’t allow setbacks to get you down since you are bound to fall upon many setbacks in life. Obstacles help enrich your mental experience in so far as building resilience, fortitude and strength. Every time you tackle a problem, you overcome a mental hurdle.

6. Develop A Growth Mindset

In her book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success author Carol Dweck delves into two different mindsets required for success: Fixed or Growth mindsets. She provides a comprehensive foundation how to develop a Growth mindset, which is aspiring toward continuous improvement and building on your successes.

She states: “The passion for stretching yourself and sticking to it, even (or especially) when it’s not going well, is the hallmark of the Growth mindset. This is the mindset that allows people to thrive during some of the most challenging times in their lives.”

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Motivation Monday: Find Your Passion

Eight ways to find the true passion in life that has eluded you

If you feel lost or unfulfilled, these exercises could help you

work out what you should be doing with your life


"Follow your passion" has become a well-worn phrase. But what happens if you don't know what your passion is?

This isn't just an issue for those beginning their careers, it can be a problem for those stuck in jobs that they don't enjoy.

It's all too easy to fall into a routine that leaves you bored or unfulfilled: you want to make the switch but you're not sure what to.

These eight exercises could help you find your true passion in life.

1. Ask yourself these three simple questions

Finding your passion could be easier than you think. By answering these questions honestly, you could work out what to do with the rest of your life.

"What subject could I read 500 books about without getting bored?"

"What could I do for five years straight without getting paid?"

"What would I spend my time doing if I had complete financial abundance to do anything?"

2. Don't presume that your passion should be your job

Hunter S. Thompson, the gonzo journalist and novelist, once said: "Anything that gets your blood racing is probably worth doing."

"There are a lot of things worth doing that will never bring you money," writes Heather Ennis. "You don't have to be great at something to be passionate about it.

"If you can't imagine not doing something, it's a passion. It doesn't have to be a moneymaker. Make your money some way that will give you the time for what you really love to do."

3. Work out what you hate doing

List the jobs or tasks that you absolutely loathe. Once you have eliminated these options, your true passion may become more clear. Create a list of the people you are jealous of to get more clarity on the issue.

"Ask this question: who do I envy the most due to the work they do?" Guarav Joshi says. "List multiple individuals, then look at the work they do, and try those things. You might find your passion from that list."

4. Find the things you are mediocre at

Even if they don't possess exceptional skills at any one thing, most people have lots of specialisms that they are "okay" at.

According to Oliver Emberton, founder of software start-up Silktide, if you fuse your mediocre skills together, you'll find your passion.

"Say you’re an average artist, with a decent sense of humour," he explains. "You won’t have much hope with an art degree, and you can’t study ‘humour’ as a subject. But you could be an awesome cartoonist.

"Or take an average business student, with some programming ability, and decent sales skills. That person is surprisingly well suited to become the boss of others who were better than them in any one of those areas."

Emberton argues that the most successful people, the ones that are most passionate about their work, are almost never defined by a single skill.

"They are a fusion of skills, often not even exceptional skills, but they’ve made their fusion exceptional," he says.

"Steve Jobs was not the world’s greatest engineer, salesperson, designer or businessman. But he was uniquely good enough at all of these things, and wove them together into something far greater."

5. Forget the 'Eureka!' moment

Inspiration may strike some people in an instant. Suddenly, they know what they should be doing with their lives. For others, it takes work.

Quora poster Logan Jay recommends spending 20 minutes each day thinking about the things that have interested you recently, or any opportunities that you have spotted.

"Your true passion is not found overnight, but is realised through series of discoveries of small interests," he says. "I have always regarded thinking/meditating as a process of reading/analyzing your mind, which in turn leads to discovering your true passion."

Try asking close friends and family what they think you should be doing with your life. But don't put people on the spot, as they may rush their answers.

If any of your nearest and dearest have hobbies or passions that interest you, ask to spend some time helping out, or giving them a try. Experiment with new activities, whether it's a new sport, learning a language, or trying a craft, as much as possible.

6. Remember what you loved doing as a child

Did you love to draw or write stories when you were young? Try to remember the activities that you enjoyed during your childhood, before the pressure to study the right subjects or get a good job began to mount.

What hobbies did you enjoy doing before life got in the way? Would you enjoy those activities now? Use these memories to help you find your true passion as an adult.

Perhaps you still have hobbies now. Could you expand on them so they take more of a centre stage in your life?

Or take a new perspective: imagine that you are very old. What do you wish you had spent the last 20 to 30 years doing? Think of it as a slightly less gloomy version of writing your own obituary.

7. Create something brand new

According to Emberton, the secret to finding your passion is to create something new. He argues that people are instantly passionate about projects, businesses or services that they start from scratch.

"When you create something new, you’re inventing something to be passionate about," he explains. "Whether you design novelty cushions, or write Batman stories, or start a Twitter account dedicated to fact-checking politicians."

However, success is key to finding one's true passion, he warns. "If your new Twitter account only has five followers after a year, you probably won’t be too passionate about it," he says. "If you had 5m, you’d have quit your job. You must find success to fuel your passion."

8. Try visualisation

Imagine yourself getting up early, jumping out of bed, excited about going to work. You get dressed quickly, full of enthusiasm about your day. The sun is shining and you take those first steps out of your bedroom. Now work out where you are going and what kind of job follows on from that feeling of anticipation.

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VBS Team Event 2019

In February 2019, our team came together in Dallas for a team building DISC Assessment exercise with the G.O.A.T - Eric Thomas! He takes the DISC assessment to a different level with the Animal Assessment and taught us how to communicate effectively with each other and any personality we come across. This day will be in the history books!

I knew my team was amazing but they all look like superheroes to me now, all with a combination of powers that I lack and powers the company so desperately needs to reach the next level. I anticipated that they would enjoy this experience but EVERY SINGLE PERSON has contacted me after and said, "this changed my life." To hear that from one person puts me on a natural high to hear that from each team member has transcended my spirit. - Tiffany Haynes, Owner (VBS Real Estate)


I cannot say enough good things about the Assessment Review that Eric and his team did for our business. From the review via phone call, prior to the event, to the team building session, it was informative, personable, and motivating. The assessment was spot on in capturing my true personality, preferences, and adaptive style. It helped me to see a birds-eye-view on how I react to different situations, manage stress, deal with other personalities, parent, work in business, and on a personal level. On the day of the event, Eric and his team were able to break down the different animals in a way that helped our team be able to understand one another better. We were able to look at how our team was functioning and see ways in which we could improve, what we were doing right, and how we can continue to work together most efficiently in order to propel the business forward for success. It was a great day! I would highly recommend having ET and his team come and do the same event for your business/team! - Tristan Skiles, COO (VBS Real Estate)

The event was packed full of insightful information. Gaining better insight into myself, my preferred method of communication, as well as my triggers, has been helpful not only at work but at home too. It was extremely beneficial to also gain insight into how others think and prefer to be communicated with and how they might react in different situations. One of my most impactful takeaways was learning how to adapt without compromising my true self! - Angela Williams, Listing Coordinating Manager (VBS Real Estate)

The whole day was amazing! Starting with the test, I found out I am not the animal I expected. After ET and Preach talked to us, they made me realize that how I am and knowing how I react to people and situations is okay. My strengths are an asset, and by knowing my weaknesses, I can now work on them in order to help myself perform better. ET was truly an energetic force! He made things clear and helped our whole team realize we can function on another level! It was simply awesome! - Shelly Labrier, Virtual Assistant (VBS Real Estate)

I had the Privilege of meeting and speaking with Eric Thomas. Little did I know how much it would change my outlook on individuals, work, and my personal life. He explained to me my personality and why I work the way I do, as well as my co-workers. It opened my eyes to what I am better at doing and helped my co-workers see it as well. I now have tasks I LOVE to work on. Not only does that make me happy but also helps my company grow. I feel I can read people much better and see how they work in different environments. Eric has really opened a door for me personally. I see how my husband and children’s personalities are all different and it helps me work things out with them in a different way. Honestly, life and relationships in a workplace and home have been set at ease and much more relaxed. I can’t thank Eric enough for speaking with all of us at our company and helping us grow with each other and ourselves. - Laura Southwell, Virtual Assistant (VBS Real Estate)


North DFW Real Producers Magazine

We are proud to partner with North DFW Real Producers! We are so excited to be featured in the magazine and look forward to developing a great partnership and friendship!

ABOUT

4 years ago Real Producers Magazine was a just a cool idea. Now we are in over 50 markets across the United States and expanding like wildfire! North DFW Real Producers being one of our most recent markets.

What is it? Who is it for? What value does it provide me and my business?

We are telling the stories of the top 500 real estate agents within North Dallas Fort Worth. In just North DFW alone, there are ~20,000 real estate agents. Yes, that is right. 20,000. Of that, the top 500 agents are doing over 80% of all the business. These are the agents who make the market what it is. They take this job seriously and they are doing it at an extremely high level. We have a tremendous amount of respect for these agents. If you heard real estate was easy, you heard from an ill-advised source. Just ask one of our agents - they will set you straight!

The mission of Real Producers is simple. We strive to inform and inspire the top producing real estate agents in the local market and connect them socially. The secondary focus is to provide an avenue for our affiliate partners to create relationships with these top performers on a level that they might not be able to achieve on their own.